Solutions By Dr. Loev


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Recovering From the Extra-Marital Affair

The incidence of extra marital affairs is growing. Social media facilitates the opportunity to engage in behaviors like flirting or more with the opposite sex. What rules should couples enforce to avoid this painful experience? Once mistakes are made can couples recover?

There are key stages in the recovery process. If you believe your marriage is worth saving, professional guidance can make a difference. The national average of couples that recover is 35%. Dr. Loev has a recovery rate of 97% among the couples he sees.

Many relationships become better as a result of engaging on a course of self discovery. With his unique approach, Dr. Loev can help you and your partner come to a new understanding.

Dealing with a Bipolar Personality

There are approximately 6 million people in the Unites States diagnosed with bipolar disorder. There is also a sizable number of people who have a bipolar disorder dormant in their system.

Bipolar people face many unique challenges to experience satisfying relationships at work, in love, and with others.

Dr. Loev has constructed a unique model to enable people to better cope with this disorder. To understand this disorder, you first must conceptualize it. This model becomes the cornerstone of our counseling. Cognitive therapy is used to further increase the individuals ability to lead a more harmonious life.

Bipolar Marriage Support Center

Bipolar couples are reported to have a 90% divorce rate. Because of this staggering statistic Dr. Irv Loev, Ph.D. created the Bipolar Marriage Support Center to meet the unique needs of bipolar couples. Counseling focuses exclusively on bipolar marital issues for individuals, couples, or groups of people dealing with a bipolar person. Dr. Loev has a variety of breakthrough treatment approaches developed to assist couples to be successful in their relationships. These unique methods help the bipolar person understand their own actions, motivations and life choices in such a way that new behavior comes naturally and change is significant.

For many, the bipolar disorder goes undiagnosed or lies dormant in the person to appear later after a trauma. Dr. Loev recognizes that the incidence of bipolar disorders are on the rise. Consequently, we can all benefit from a better understanding of bipolar behavior and learn to appreciate our relationships for the energy, enthusiasm and intelligence our bipolar friends and loved ones possess.

Dr. Loev believes that a counselor or therapist needs to be honest about the fact that working with some people or populations is more enjoyable than others. For Dr. Loev it is the bipolar population, whom he finds to be very intelligent, quick to make associations and most of all motivated to improve their lives.

Dr. Loev is convinced that when the bipolar individual learns to understand to recognize their own tendencies, their lives change dramatically for the better.

Dr. Loev's Bipolar Model
The model below is a metaphor to better understand the bipolar personality.

bipolar model

Think of an atom. You are the center and the dots circling you are the protons. Protons are always in motion. If they speed up, this means you are starting to feel anxious. When the protons move too rapidly, your anxiety can transfer to hostility. Awareness of the speed helps the bipolar person recognize when they need to remove themselves from a situation.

Many of Dr. Loev's therapies are outlined in his book Conflict Means I Love You.


The Effects of Childhood Abandonment on Adult Relationships

Abandonment can take many forms. The time of its occurrence is extremely critical.  Dr. Loev believes that abandonment that occurs before the age of ten will have a much bigger impact than if experienced in the later teens.

The different forms of abandonment include: a parent dying, having a parent who is emotionally unavailable, or when parents divorce and one parent does not value a relationship with the child and does not stay involved in the child's life.

Dr. Loev has counseled many adults experiencing difficulty forming healthy relationships who discover a link to this childhood trauma. Many have difficulty committing to a permanent relationship and they may resist by building emotional walls that lead to frequent breakups. Others who are happily married, are working to understand why they are compelled to have extramarital affairs.

Typically people with relationship problems do not realize their issues sometimes stem from fear of being abandoned. In most cases, recognizing their motivations, and learning healthy connections with a parent, sibling or other relatives helps them acknowledge their fears and overcome them. Dr. Loev's unique instruction helps patients recognize their previous influences and move forward.

Dr. Loev shares several case histories of patients with Childhood Abandonment issues in his book Conflict Means I Love You.

Stopping Compulsive Internet Behavior

Frequently sexual desires are forged in the formative years. What may result if a male child is exposed to pornographic images at ages 7 through 14? These experiences can be very destructive.

A child may grow older preferring these same sexual stimuli. Often it is hard for the child as an adult to have mature sexual experiences with a partner. The result can be compulsive behavior on the internet.

This path can be very painful to a marriage. Clinical counseling can enable the gentleman to learn a new path while better understanding how the original path was chosen.

Improving Sexual Relations

Couple holding handsThe number of sexless marriages in the United States is shocking. Couples appear to be in denial. Many couples come to see me when there has been little or no intimacy in years. The internet has been a large contributor to this concern.

A second area of concern occurs when one person (the male) has a much greater sex drive than the female. Learn how to deal with this dynamic without letting the difference drag down the marriage with conflict.

Conflict Means I Love You

Are You BLUE or RED? - Sex and the two identities

To resolve conflict in a relationship, it is helpful to consider two distinct relationship types; Blue and Red. We all live according to one relationship type which is identified by the perceptions we experience over and over in a close relationship, and which can lead us to be angry and frustrated with the other person. Knowing the characteristics of these types helps you to better understand your own relationshp identity and the perceptions of your partner. What would happen if you knew what your spouse might be thinking, especially what angers them? Wouldn't that give you a greater advantage to solve or avoid conflicts?

Dr. Loev has written an informative and timely book, which enables readers to better understand themselves, as well as their partner. The much in-demand book is entitled "Conflict Means I Love You."

Conflict Means I Love You book
Conflict Means I Love You

This book describes interaction. Also learn why particular men have a greater sex drive than their partner and what to do about it. Relationships are essential to our lives. Better understanding of our needs and the needs of our partner enables us to increase our chances of success and satisfaction.

Learn why we choose who we do and how to make this relationship the best IT can be. Tips on all aspects of a relationship are offered. How to connect better emotionally as well as sexually.